Oh Danny Boy
I don’t know why my parents
named me Dan, other than my mother shared with me once that it was the name she
preferred. My father wanted to name me
Patrick. She never explained why she
preferred it. But, I do remember
watching the Lawrence Welk show with my parents when I was young and hearing
Joe Feeney, the Irish tenor sing Oh, Danny Boy. My mother always hummed along with tears welling
up in her eyes. I remember that seeing
those tears made me feel warm, sad, lonesome and loved all at the same
time. My mother passed away on Christmas
Eve 1979.
Over the years of course, I
have heard many other people sing Oh Danny Boy – usually on or around St.
Patrick’s Day. Hearing the song is as
much a sign of spring as the chirping of the freshly returned robin. To this day when I hear the song it is always
a moment to pause and remember my mother, the fact that the song made her cry,
and also the knowledge that she chose that name for me. I find that the song still makes me feel
warm, sad, lonesome and loved all at the same time.
The song, of course, is
vintage Ireland. My mother certainly had
a large dose of Irish blood as her mother was first generation American. My grandmother’s parents both came from
Ireland to the United States. I strongly
suspect that my mother’s Irish roots certainly played a role in her fondness
for the song, and her fondness for the name Dan.
Several years ago, my wife
and I had the opportunity to visit Ireland.
The tour was a pilgrimage that focused on holy and religious sites, but even
so, I don’t believe a single day passed without us hearing someone sing Oh,
Danny Boy. It is an apparent
requirement of anyone with a microphone and an audience in Ireland to sing that
song. Obviously the Irish, and most
people throughout the world, immediately recognize it as an Irish song – a national
treasure even.
It was in hearing so many renditions while in Ireland that I was struck by the fact that
the song is equally moving whether it is sung by a man or a woman. Maybe that comes from the ongoing debate
about the song’s meaning. Some say that
the song is a ballad of longing of a parent for their child – the son either
having gone off to war, or perhaps he was one of the millions who fled the
country in the Great Hunger that Ireland suffered in the mid-1800’s. Regardless of the cause of separation, if
appreciated as written from a parent’s perspective, it is understandable why it
can appeal whether sung by a male or female voice. Others propose that it is a song of the
separation of lovers. Whether of
patriotism or unique personal relationship, whether of child or lover, the song
certainly sings of the trust in the hearts of believers that love is stronger
than even death; love is eternal.
Even though my mother chose
the name, it was my father who actually called me Danny. My father was a man who struggled to express
his affection in any other way. I can’t
recall him in the 26 years we shared ever saying that he loved me, or a hug, or saying that he was proud
of me. So, his calling me “Danny” will
always be our special connection. That’s
why, to this day, whenever anyone else has tried to refer to me that way, I always
correct them: “Only my father called me Danny.”
My parents have both been gone many, many years now, but I regularly visit the place where they are lying; I kneel, I pray an Ave for them. Kneeling there, I sense again that love truly is stronger than separation; love is stronger than even death. In my heart I can hear, “Oh Danny boy, Oh Danny boy, I love you so.” And my mother softly humming along. I love them too.
His Peace <><
Deacon Dan
Photo by Autumn Martin on Unsplash
Photo by Annie Spratt on Unsplash
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